Top 10 Movies That Totally Wasted My Time

Since January is usually a dumping ground for studios with them releasing their worst movies, I decided it would be fun to share the 10 worst movies that I have seen. These are all movies that don't even loop around to being so bad that they are good. They are just bad. I'm kind of limited to mostly larger films, as I didn't want to dump on a bunch of indie small movies, but there are a couple of those due to the intent behind them. With all of that said, here are the 10 worst movies I have ever seen.

1. Winnie the Pooh: Blood and Honey

Winnie the Pooh: Blood and Honey is a smaller indie film, but the reason behind making it is why it makes the list. This movie was made almost immediately after Winnie the Pooh went into the public domain. I would have been fine with this movie had it been a horror movie with Winnie the Pooh being key to the plot, but it isn't. This movie is just a generic slasher film with a Winnie the Pooh skin on it. There is no reason to make this movie outside of capitalizing on the free-to-use IP. Had it been a little more fun and embraced the Winnie the Pooh aspects, I could have seen past the cheap-looking costumes, but it just wastes the whole idea. Why do a Winnie the Pooh slasher if you aren't going to go all in on the idea? The acting is abysmal, the animal characters look bad, and the kills aren't even good. Overall, there is nothing about this movie that makes it good. It is just a cynical attempt at utilizing a free IP in the lamest way possible.

Score: 2/10 Grade: E

2. Sharknado

Sharknado is easily the most nonsensical shark movie out there to span a franchise of seven, yes seven, films. If the name isn't a clear indicator, the movie is about tornados flying around with sharks in them which is about as absurd as you can get. The Sharknado franchise manages to get even more absurd from there with the final Sharknado movie throwing time travel into the mix. Sharknado is the type of movie you watch because of how bad it is. From terrible acting to stupid characters to awful CGI, the movie has it all. This is the type of movie that is so terrible and has so much nonsense that it is funny but still not good. My mother-in-law seems to really like this movie for some reason but just sit there shaking my head and laughing at how terrible it is.

Score: 2/10 Grade: E

3. After Earth

After Earth is basically Nepotism: The Movie. It was directed by the once great M. Night Shyamalan and was supposed to be a prehistoric Earth story. However, the movie gets hijacked by Will Smith so that the movie can be a starring vehicle for his son. Jaden Smith is not good in this movie and was so bad that he hasn't been in anything since. The movie is just incredibly boring and has terribly written dialogue. There is literally a line from Jaden Smith after his suit changes color that says, "I like it, but I think it means something bad". That is the quality we are dealing with here. Not even Will Smith could save the movie with his charm because he has none of it in this movie. He spends the entire film stuck in a spaceship and is just an extremely stern father with no personality. Not something you want to see Will Smith doing. This movie is just so cynical. They didn't even try to make a good story as long as Will Smith could get his son a starring role. In the end, this was just a terrible Sci-Fi film and is an example of the negative effects of nepotism in Hollywood.

Score: 3/10 Grade: D-

4. Superman IV: The Quest for Peace

Superman IV is widely regarded as one of the worst movies ever made coming in at #88 of the lowest-rated movies on IMDB. The biggest thing that hurt this movie was that the budget got slashed. The movie was given a budget of $17 million which was half of the budget for Superman III and a third of the budget of the first two films. To save money, they had to do a lot of things that ultimately hurt the quality of the film. They reuse the same flying over and over again and it is painfully obvious. The fight scenes between Nuclear Man and Superman and the special effects in general look terrible even by 1980s standards. The plot itself is complete garbage as it is about Superman taking all of the world's nuclear weapons and launching them into the sun because a kid asked him to and just assumed the world would be cool with it and not make more weapons. It is as stupid as it sounds. They somehow blackmailed Gene Hackman to be in the movie and even that doesn't bring any merits to it. The movie is full of terrible acting, bad voice dubs, and poor miniature models. The movie also just makes up powers for Superman such as fixing the Great Wall of China with his eyes and allowing people to breathe in space. Overall, this is just a terrible movie that can just be erased from the Superman legacy.

Score: 3/10 Grade: D-

5. Fantastic Four

Fantastic Four (2015) or Fant4stic as the cool kids call it, is the last of the Fox Fantastic Four films and easily the worst. This movie is ruined by bad ideas, even worse execution, and worst of all, studio interference. The movie takes the classic characters who are supposed to be scientists and astronauts and turns them into a bunch of college kids with an internship. The movie is also extremely boring as nothing happens for the entire runtime. It takes 45 minutes for the characters to even get their powers and then 30 minutes before they even fight anybody. It has been reported that Fox cut so much out of this movie including 3 action sequences to bring the movie from a 2 hour and 20 minute runtime to an hour and 40 minute runtime. The movie was also corrupted by so many rewrites and reshoots to the point that the director pretty much-lost control of the movie. The Fantastic Four doesn't even feel like a team as they don't even come together until the last 15 minutes of the movie. The whole idea of the Fantastic Four is a superhero family and this movie misses all of that. On top of that, the movie just butchers Doctor Doom by having him randomly show up as the big villain in the last 15 minutes of the movie. No build-up, no introduction, he is just there because the movie needs to end. Overall, this movie is a disaster from beginning to end and proved that the Fantastic Four should be in Marvel's hands.

Score: 3.5/10 Grade: D

6. Halloween V: The Revenge of Michael Myers

Halloween 5 is definitively the worst in the franchise and where the series hits its low point. While it does have a few solid kills in the film, this movie as a whole is just not good. Starting off, the overall plot is just terrible. There is no connective story as the movie keeps shifting its main characters. The movie essentially has three different stories with not much interconnection to them. We start with Michael killing off Jamie's sister, he then decides to stalk Tina, who is completely unaware of the previous killing and is not a compelling character at all. After they kill her off, the movie follows the mute girl who broke out of the mental institution. The movie is also quite boring, there aren't many kills in the film and Michael is absent for a good chunk of the movie. Overall, this is an easily skippable film in the franchise and has nothing worth watching.

Score: 3.5/10 Grade: D-

7. The Expendables 4

Expend4bles is by far the worst pure action movie I have seen. It has a few good action sequences and a fun enough performance from Jason Statham but beyond that, this movie is just not good. One of the biggest issues is that it utilized CGI way too much in its action scenes and set pieces. Stuff that used to be done on site in the other films was done on green screens and action sequences that were usually done practically were done with CGI. The movie doesn't have any of the fun star power that the other films have and the stars that they do have get sidelines to have the movie center around Jason Statham. I also felt that the new characters were extremely forgettable with little to no chemistry with the original crew along with villains that left no mark on the film. The whole point of the Expendables films is to deliver a movie with big action and 80s star power and this movie completely missed the mark. I also was not a fan of the direction they took the story and the Barney character. It just felt like it defeated the purpose of these films. In the end, this is a film that totally missed its purpose and ultimately failed to live up to the other films in the franchise.

Score: 4/10 Grade: D+

8. Rocky V

Rocky V is by far the worst movie in the Rocky franchise. The movie disrupts everything the other films built from Rocky's fame to his relationship with his family. The two decent ideas in the movie, Rocky taking on a protégée and Rocky having a strained relationship with his son are done better in later movies (Creed and Rocky Balboa). The movie just destroys Rocky's character by making him so insufferable for 2/3rds of the movie. Rocky is completely different in this movie as none of the other movies would have him neglect his son like this. The movie also ends in such a trashy way with a street fight and somehow tries to frame it as this big payoff of the last four films which just doesn't work. Overall, there isn't much anything redeeming about this movie. If I'm going to rewatch the Rocky franchise, I will probably skip this one.

Score: 4/10 Grade: D+

9. Megalopolis

Megalopolis is the newest film from Francis Ford Coppola and was just a bit much for me. The movie seemed to be more concerned with the artistic vision and themes than it was about telling a coherent story. For probably 80% of the movie, I had no idea what was going on nor could I now give an accurate summary of the film. The film was just way too wrapped in its Shakespearean tone and grandiose appearance. This was one of the few films that I have seen that tried to tackle so many ideas while actually accomplishing so little. There are so many different plots going on with no clear lead in the story. I also thought that many of the actors didn't know how to handle the story and ended up giving performances that portrayed them more as an archetype than an actual character. The only positive I can give is that the cinematography and style make the movie look really good. The story may be incoherent but the visuals look great. Overall, this is a film where the director's artistic vision and ambition got in the way of telling an understandable story.

Score: 4/10 Grade: D+

10. Transformers: The Last Knight

Michael Bay's last entry into the Transformers franchise is definitely the worst in the franchise. Before the release of this movie, Paramount shared that the Transformers writers went away on a retreat and came back with 17 different movie ideas for Transformers. This movie felt like they crammed all of those ideas into one movie and called it good. There are so many different storylines that it is impossible for one to be good. Optimus Prime trying to find Cybertron, Prime turning evil, Cybertron invading Earth, King Arthur, and Transformers are being hunted by the government, just to name a few. This movie has no focus and jumps around to too many different plot lines that the whole movie is just a mess. There is no reason why all of these plots should be one film as some of them aren't even remotely connected to others. It also has a mess of dialogue as it literally spends 5 minutes talking about how long it has been since Mark Wahlberg has had "whoopie" (the character's words, not mine). The characters themselves are all super bland and pointless with none of them getting any sort of arc. Even the action is super forgettable with no fun sequences. In the end, this is a disaster of a Transformers movie and not a good way for Michael Bay to go out of the franchise.

Score: 4/10 Grade: D+